Tuesday, December 4, 2012

in a wife

I have been up since early yesterday, and when I got home in stead of going straight to bed I decided to watch Blake Sheltons Christmas special that I recorded.  Just threw that in to let you know I am not thinking straight. Yes, even  less than normal. As I was taking a quick shower a thought bounced through my head.I might get married again someday...Heck the Saints won a Superbowl, stuff can happen! So aside from loving God, country, and my boy ( I guess me too) I think I need this from a wife:
   She must not only need to know which football teams to love, but which ones to hate. I know hate is a strong word but we are talking football not the other less important sports.
   She really needs to know how to cook a mean chicken fried steak, and make a real banana pudding. If she  can run to Del Rancho and buy a chicken fried steak and put it on my plate with out me knowing, that can slide but no business makes good banana pudding.
  She needs to remember to put the lid up. Ha ha. thought I would throw that in.
   Listen to George Strait with me..No give on that. If she will listen to the Statler Brothers and Elvis with me I promise not to forget anniversary or birthday presents.
    Must like real Christmas trees and,  butter.She must never buy me flip flops or expect me to wear them. Ever! She will need to watch Its A Wonderful Life with me once a year. Not to have cats, at least inside. This is important...Never plan anything, Anything, on Superbowl Sunday! Must put up with my friends and understand Larry is loud and me and Lorne do tend to fight.
    I need her to buy toilet paper, I will pump the gas. She must not get mad when I stay up all night watching John Wayne movies or Tombstone, I cant help it. She needs to get on me when I say the really bad cuss words.
  I guess anything else is trivial. I did cover the no rap, and Superbowl is my day right? Well as I swallow my Ambien and go to bed I wonder if their is some cowboy chick out that writing a list just like this. Maybe she subs Reba for George Strait, but if we pass in Walmart I hope I am sucking my gut in.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Thats my Job

That's my job
That's what I do
Everything I do is because of you
To keep you safe with me
That's my job you see

It has been said, find something you love to do, and you will never work a day in your life. Well maybe so but Old Chicago is not going to pay me to eat pizza and drink beer. Fox Sports has not offered me a contract to watch the Dallas Cowboys play. Believe it or not I have never been paid to argue with a fence post..Yea that one is a shocker to me too!
   When we were little kids me and my sister used to dig up little cacti (more than one cactus Lorne) plant them in little plastic pots and peddle them door to door. It was fun for us and my first shot at making my own money. I landed my next job when I was about 14 after getting in a fight with a friend of mine at the Gatesville rodeo, and my shirt was covered in blood. A Neighbor who lived a couple of miles down the road ..yes he was a neighbor we lived way out in the sticks..asked if I was tough. Well heck yea I thought at the time and said so. He offered me a job breaking horses. Well mainly I broke my back cleaning stalls, hauling hay, mowing..Not much bronc stompin involved, but it was a job. My next job was great! Me and Larry running projectors at the  drive-in for Don and Cheryl and Gene Palmer. That was something I loved and they would probably agree I didn't work a day! But I did eat popcorn and drink coke and managed to throw the picture on the screen, but I had to graduate high school and find higher paying work. So I went to work at a factory building boats. I screwed up enough stuff that finally I was reduced to taking out trash and generally cleaning up. It had to be done and I had to keep a job. After a summer of that I joined the U S Army for four years. I went in knowing it was not for a career but I needed to do it. When I got out of the Army my career in low paying jobs went something like this: feed mill( one day) concrete work, movie theatre, V A regional office filing stuff, Sonic, machine shop, meter reader, furniture salesman, car salesman, ice cream merchandiser and TA DA truck driver! I know I left things out. I actually wrote the news for a tv station in Waco for a short while, did telemarketing for a week or so. I really like driving a truck but if I won the lotto that would be my last day , so I guess I don't love it.
   Well somewhere after work I found time to get married and have a kid. The marriage didn't last ( we are still friends) but I think this dad thing will stick. I never liked kids before and really did not think I was going to like mine much  more than I liked other kids.
   Some one mentioned to me I was doing a good job with Carl. Some one else reminded me it was the most  important job I will ever have. A dads job is never done...
   Funny thing is being Carl's dad is not work. Its not something I have to do, it is something I get to do. It is not my job, but it is what I do.

Monday, November 12, 2012

A Sunday Mostly Alone

Today did not start promising, then got worse for a time. But only a short time. Thunder barked me wide awake at 4:30 am. As in the morning. Well I couldn't go back to sleep so I stayed in bed and listened to the rain,wondering if I had my windows rolled up or had boots in the bed of my pick up like I usually do. I watched 5:30 roll around until I finally bored myself back to sleep. But only for a short time. Somewhere around 8:30 I woke up dreaming something incoherent about the cops...oh, sorry police. Eventually I realized that I was fully awake but could still hear sirens so I looked out my living room window to see a full blown firetruck in front of my house. I didn't smell smoke. Then an ambulance pulled up.Then two cop cars. Sorry police cruisers. About that time my beer drinking neighbor walked out holding the side of his head. I still don't know what that was about but sleep was no longer in my future. What I needed was a 44 ounce diet Mt Dew. I grabbed my keys and actually started to open my door before I realized or remembered...my truck, windows up or down was not in my driveway but behind the Blue Bayou. Heck I hope my mom doesn't hear about this. I met my uncle and cousin there  to watch the second half of the OU game, and since I drank 3 or 4 beers I decided not to drive. So I was dropped of at ...you guessed Old Chicago. Back to this morning. When I turned away from my window after the ambulance left I spotted the pizza box on my couch. Yea remembered that.
   After a few phone calls my cousin came to take me to get my truck. Oh yea my windows were rolled up after all. Well all except the one busted out by the thief that emptied my glove box and center console. In the words of a thousand defeated boxers "I was robbed." I had nothing of value in my wallet in my truck. I had my drivers license and bank card in my pocket, but they did break out my window and my pick up was rained into while I was not sleeping through it. So whats a guy to do? This is the only Sunday I am going to get this week. My boy Carl had spent the night at a friends. So I decide to go to my version of Cheers. Old Chicago, where everyone knows my name. Things would certainly go better there. A side bar about Old Chicago-the manager is Very good looking, but of course that's not why I go. So I go there knowing my day will be better. So the before mentioned manager walks up to me..big smile my day is looking up.. and with an expression usually reserved for wives she deadpans " You are in trouble". Dang. I left last night without paying. I skipped my tab. No wonder I thought I didn't spend much last night, ha ha I didn't!
  Now to the good part, and no not more screw ups, the good part. Football. I love football and I guess my favorite thing on earth is to watch the Cowboys play eat a pizza ( I happened to find a free one on my couch)  and drink a few beers. Normally this gaiety is shared with Carl and Larry or Lorne or other friends but today I was alone. I had a blast! I didn't have to suck my gut in because of some pretty girl in the room. I didn't have to wait on the bathroom. I ate pizza , drank a few beers flipped from game to game and of course the Dallas Cowboys beat the highly hated Philly Eagles, and like free ice cream, the Giants lost too!This is the only Sunday I am getting this week, glad it was a good one.

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Girls women and ladies

'There's girls and there's women and there's ladies
 there's yes'es and no's and maybe's
 there's tease'n and please'n they start learning when they're babies
 there's girls there's women and there's ladies

It may come as a shock to some but I like women. I really don't have a type but Sandra Bullock will do. So will that girl at 7-11 who lights up when I come in.My first two wives were very different but we found a way to be married. On second thought maybe that's not a good example. But on both accounts we found some common ground for awhile.I like a girl that can really cook but neither wife was Paula Dean in the kitchen. One wife was blond and blue eyed, one had beautiful brown hair and eyes. One was bossy ( and bitchy) one  was the most even natured person I have ever known.But this isn't about ex wives.
   I guess this about chasing women at my age.I never chased much when I was younger because I was pretty dang shy. And in shape.And really didn't have too much. I guess things change. I am not all that shy or in shape. But I still like girls a great deal. Is alot a real word? That works too.Hank Jr sang a song" I really like girls".  He didnt pay me royalties but he is Hank Jr so I will let him slide.
  Kansas: Well I went to Kansas to work with Larry and the first night I was there the company took us out to eat and the dang place dimmed the lights at 9 and played music. Me Larry and my bosses( and wives) two stepped all over. That's a good first day at work! Then they sent me to Tulsa.
   My boss woke me up the day after saying some one called her saying there was a drunk cowboy sleeping in her office.Don't know about the drunk part but I did sleep in her office. A great place called The Hunt Club was across the street and I had a few beers and met a girl who I have no business being friends with. She is early twenties...I am not.She has tattoo's and piercings again I do not but we just get along. What does this mean to me today?
   I guess this is what I am getting too. I like girls. I make friends pretty easy. I am pretty old but I am pretty good with my life. I am not going to date some one who really doesn't like me just so I can say I am dating.  I don't care who she is or how pretty she is. I cant be a constellation prize and teach Carl self worth and not to settle if I do. I am fighting this right now. A girl who drives me crazy but just keeps me hanging on...I guess writing this will keep me being true.
  Ever walk in a place and see someone light up when they see you? That's what I am gonna have or I am gonna get a hungry dog...
   So let's drink another round to to you and me ....and them

Monday, October 22, 2012

when Harry Met Sally

We all tell the stories, you know the gorgeous girls we went out with before we got married. The beautiful women before we got old.  Well the other night when I couldn't get sleepy -yea that night- I tried to look up this girl I went out with once. Once! I worked with her mom and since her mother didn't go out drinking with me or see me out of the office,mom  thought that I was a good guy, and called Kim Mackie and me and Kim went to see a Matinee. It was When Harry Met Sally.
   Kim and I had a few classes along side each other at MCC in Waco but I was much to shy to talk to her much. But I did work with mom. So we go see When Harry Met Sally one of the greatest romantic comedies of all times but I never talked to her much again. A great one time date in my little life, and certainly  she must wonder from time to time about me, right?
  So with the magic of face book I see her profile and ask her how her mom is-fine-and how she is:wonderful  but she does not remember me. Me who brushed my teeth in the car, and sprayed that stuff under my arms before meeting her out side of Waco Square six. Me who paid for popcorn and Coke at full price even though I could have got it for free but didn't want her to think I was a cheapskate. She didn't remember me at all. Her response was nice and she did remember watching the movie there, but I slipped her mind.
    What does this have to do with me today in Oklahoma City? The part of the movie...the main theme ...that men and women cannot be friends because of the sex part.It is our fault , the guys fault. I guess it is true and I guess I might have proved it.  Guys always want more. We cant help it.
  I have a bartender friend that has been my friend for 5 years and I guess our messages got crossed and that's not hard to do when she is beautiful and I like beauty. Any way I have just gone about 5 weeks or so with out seeing my friend, until the last day or so, but tonight things were close to old times and getting better.


Saturday, October 20, 2012

State of the Union

Its a little after 11 pm (2300 hours to my military friends) and I have made the command decision to start another blog. It just seems like the right time.  Some friends do know I used to write one on AOL a number of years ago and I really enjoyed it. This wont be about politics or dating or selling you junk. Nope, this will be about a normal guy ( quit laughing I can come off as normal if I have too!) trucking through the backside of his forties trying to make a living and raise a boy and make a friend or two along the way. 
   I am calling this one State of the Union because once a year the President gives a State of the Union address to let us regular folks what kind of shape our Republic is in. Since this is my first blog its a get to know me posting. 
   I live on the South Side of Oklahoma City, which is the good side because it's where the cowboys( and Cowgirls!) live. Its too snobby on the Northside for me. I live about 4 or five miles from my skinny brother and his family, and a few miles from my mom. Just by chance I live 1.5 miles from the greatest place on the Southside : Old Chicago!  I spend a great deal of time there eating pizza and hanging out with my friends. More on Old Chicago and why pizza is just my 3rd favorite thing there at a later time. I am trying to hurry this first posting a bit because I did take an Ambien a bit ago....More on that at some other time:/
  I drive an 18 wheeler, just like in the great Alabama song 'Roll On'. Right now I am working in Tulsa and since that is over an hour away, I stay there for days at a time then come home on my days off. And as most can guess I am working with Larry. He is my best friend and we have had somewhere in the neighborhood of 15 jobs together.My first job was working at the Town and Country Drive-In in Gatesville Texas. You guessed it, Larry worked there also. He was supposed to be training me so I could run the projectors while he went of to chase girls at church camp. Well due to a circumstance beyond our control-Urbane Cowboy was showing-I didnt learn a thing and he went off to camp anyways. The manager Don Palmer should have fired me right then but he had the patience of Job and trained me himself. He was one of the greatest guys to ever live and he started the 30 year tradition of hiring me and Larry to work together.
   I do live by myself but my 12 year old boy Carl, or CJ as some call him stays with me when ever I am not working. He is all boy..climbs up everything, leaves his socks on the couch, wants toys he...ah I cant afford. He owns about 20 footballs and has no problem wearin my arm out playing catch. Every day. Even when it rains.He is funny and smart, and I try to take him every where I go.
  What else do I write in an intro...I LOVE football!!! The Oklahoma Sooners and the Dallas Cowboys!!! I have a pretty large fondness of women also....more on that later, but I am single, and a dad. I am a truck driver and a pretty good guy on a trivia team.. I do have to cut this short because my ole friend Ambien is working early ...yea for sleep.
   I am pretty sure this will be boring to read but I liked writing it..better stuff to come I promise.. Now how do I save this stuff?